The Skin I’m In

Mar 24, 2010 | Random

Gordon Institute of Business Science (GIBS) in Johannesburg has a number of different experiential programmes that are designed to change and expand perspective. I have been fortunate to interact with the space quite a bit and, for the last four years, have spoken at the opening session of their programme for high schools students called Spirit of Youth. The first session is always on Race and Identity.

Recently, I was invited to come share my story at their Nexus programme for session on Identity. Essentially, they had a number of guests and we were each assigned a seat with a couple of chairs around. Participants could sit anywhere and get insight into the stories of people from diverse backgrounds and experiences. There was the gay man, the inter-racial couple and bi-racial me, amongst others.

Living in South Africa, where race continues to be the first line of assumption (and judgement), I’ve been forced to figure out where I stand. I am bundled into Coloured because that is the only reference point South Africa has for mixed race people but do not consider myself Coloured.

Because of the challenge of determining my racial identity and the decision to sit on the fence and not define myself by race has prompted me to constantly seek out the perspectives of other bi-racial people, particularly those in the public space. People like Bob Marley, Barack Obama, Halle Berry, Sade, Lenny Kravitz and, closer to home, Nneka (who I had the honour of interviewing).

As I have started to re-establish a stronger link with the land of my father – Ghana – I have also started to consume and interact a great deal more with contemporary music and culture. One of my favourite ‘discoveries has been Wanlov The Kub0lor – Crowned Prince of Pidgen Music; The last Human Hippie-Hopper – and I just came across a video of his song, My Skin, from his Green Card. Born in Romania to a Ghanaian father and Romanian mother, My Skin is Wanlov making sense of himself in this world.

And this is what I wrote a couple of years ago. A poem called Duality.

i stand at the centre of a war

that has been waged for hundreds of years

a war that has been fought

with burning crosses and thick rope

with shackles, chains and whips

with hidden looks and clutched handbags

with segregation and cultural destruction

with guns and warplanes

with bullets and bombs

with sharp tongues and the devil’s eyes

with fake smiles and darkened hearts

with misunderstanding and deception

with hate and cruelty

with knives in the back and hangmen

with religion and courtrooms

i stand at the centre of war

that has been televised

commercially edited

digitally mastered

and broadcast in stereo

i stand at the centre of a war

where everything is black or white

yet i am the grey area between warring parties

i am neither black nor white

and yet i am both

i am neither african or european

and yet i am both

i am your future

devoid of a side to pick

i am your hope

devoid of your understanding

i am your greatest fear

and i am your wildest aspiration

i am the merger of your strengths

and i am the failure of your weaknesses

i am a symbol of your love

and a victim of your hatred

i am the unification of your desire to separate

and separate from your desire to unify

i am a power unto myself

and the product of your power

i am so much

and yet represent so little

i exist in the midst of the confusion

your birthed me into

because i am the product

of two factions stuck

on extreme poles of reality

i stand at the centre of a war

that has been waged for hundreds of years

a war that has been fought

with burning crosses and thick rope

with shackles, chains and whips

with hidden looks and clutched handbags

with segregation and cultural destruction

with guns and warplanes

with bullets and bombs

with sharp tongues and the devil’s eyes

with fake smiles and darkened hearts

with misunderstanding and deception

with hate and cruelty

with knives in the back and hangmen

with religion and courtrooms

i stand at the centre of war

that has been televised

commercially edited

digitally mastered

and broadcast in stereo

i stand at the centre of a war

where everything is black or white

yet i am the grey area between warring parties

i am neither black nor white

and yet i am both

i am neither african or european

and yet i am both

i am your future

devoid of a side to pick

i am your hope

devoid of your understanding

i am your greatest fear

and i am your wildest aspiration

i am the merger of your strengths

and i am the failure of your weaknesses

i am a symbol of your love

and a victim of your hatred

i am the unification of your desire to separate

and separate from your desire to unify

i am a power unto myself

and the product of your power

i am so much

and yet represent so little

i exist in the midst of the confusion

you birthed me into

because i am the product

of two factions stuck

on extreme poles of reality